Well guys I missed my promised wednesday post, so allow me to amuse you on a tuesday. I have started a new job since we last spoke and I have been working there for about a month. My project manager has been here for about 5 years and he has told me that I have single-handedly provided him with two of the three funniest moments of his tenure here.

In my first ten days, one of the major directors from my contracting company came out here. He didnt introduce himself so I had no idea who he was or what he did. He gave us a presentation and at the end of the presentation, he asked if there were any questions. I raised my hand and asked who he was and what he did. My boss had a hard time stifling his laughter.

In the past week, my boss and I were discussing babies and breast feeding and right when I was discussing boob implants impacting the ability to breast feed, my other nasa boss walked in and saw me making a motion with my hands, implying large boobs. AWKWARD. But the NASA boss made light of it, joking about a hostile work environment.

I love my new job. A lot. The people are pretty awesome, every day is different and the news the agency puts out is interesting. We launched a Mars rover Saturday the 26th and that was so pretty it almost made me cry (no joke).

Today (being Wednesday), I am already running slow… I get to the metro late. It’s packed on the platform. People are all shoving and stuff. So we all file onto the train and (I get on at the third stop from the end, mind you… so it shouldnt be that slammed) I am sandwiched between one woman who is reading the Bible and another guy who has his back to me and being taller, his elbow is at my face level. I coulda sworn he was goin to elbow me in the face… he never did.

I get off at my stop to go to work, and as I am climbing the first escalator this dude (different guy) is swinging his arms, not paying attention to anyone else or where they are… and I am thinking well if the other guy didnt do the job, this guy is going to…. he didnt on the first escalator… but SURE AS SHIT, he did on the second. SQUARE INTO MY FACE BONE! WTF!? and then he tried to deny it. I was like…. uhhh that was my face and he was like, “I dont know what you’re talkin about” and i was like, “well, you kind of used your elbow as a battering ram against my face… that kinda sucked.” he responds with “no i didn’t” and i was like “Oh it was the other guy…. next to you. the imaginary one….” and then I grabbed air. Shook it. and screamed “WHO DO YOU WORK FOR??!!”

naw. i didnt do the last bit… but now i kinda wish i had. We argued and parted ways. It was ineffective and it changed nothing. He did deny it, and I did tell him he was a douche. Ah well. I proceeded to miss a meeting and spill coffee on myself also. THANK GOD IT’S WEDNESDAY.